Encouraging your child to stay at activities a little longer

 

 

v     Engineer situations so that your child is in a position which makes it less easy to leave the activity; e.g. place his chair in the corner of the room with the table wedging him in.

 

v     Encourage your child to come to the table by showing him / her a very enticing, toy, e.g. sound posting box. Initially use highly motivating “toys” rather than ones that overly challenge him / her. Start by expecting your child to stand at the table and play with the toy. Gradually bring a chair in behind him / her, place it so your child feels gentle pressure at the back of his / her legs. Sometimes this will be enough to encourage him / her to sit. On other occasions the adult may need to gently touch your child on his /her shoulder. Wooden chairs with arms make it easier to keep your child seated on the chair. However, some children resist sitting on these chairs and do better on a conventional child’s chair.

 

v     Do not take your child away from a favourite activity to come and sit at the table for an adult selected task. Sit to one side of your child or possibly behind him / her; use your arms to gently enclose your child. If your child is tactually defensive make sure that you do not actually touch him / her. When your child is seated it is often better to move the table over on front of your child rather than disturbing your child by pulling his / her chair in.

 

v     Singing about the activity may distract your child, e.g. “This is the way we build the blocks”. Reinforce your child’s attempts at doing the activity. If necessary do it co-actively with your child in order to achieve success. Quick changes of activity help maintain a high level of interest. Place each new toy/activity directly in front of your child. Provide plenty of positive reinforcement to your child.

 

v     Be very aware of your child’s tolerance for sitting - at first only expect your child to sit for a few moments. Rather than persisting until your child is becoming restless and struggling to leave, remain in control by saying “Finished” and showing the finish symbol (chequered flag) as soon as your child shows signs of loosing interest. You may need to quickly help him / her finish the activity, if necessary put the puzzle pieces in yourself “My turn” and co-actively help him /her to replace the last piece “XXXXX’s turn”. Praise him / her and let him / her go; your child is then left with feelings of completion and achievement. To increase the length of time spent at an activity strategies like “One more” can be introduced.

 

v     Initially sit your child away from distractions, i.e. turn the radio and TV off. Do not sit him /her at the window where cars etc may be a distraction.

 

v     A child who will not sit on the floor can be encouraged to do so by engaging his / her interest in a toy or book and then gradually lowering the toy/book to the floor. Provide your child with visual cues, e.g. carpet spots on the floor to sit on, Boardmaker symbols, signs.

 

v     Applying firm pressure down your child’s arms and back (on either side of the spine) also helps settle many children.

 

 

 

 

Remember that it is critical that:

 

v    the adult is fully prepared (all toys, books etc.) ready before attempting to encourage sitting

v    the adult needs to be in control not your child

v    the adult needs to remain positive and calm throughout

 

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© Gay von Ess 1998